TV REVIEW: Just Another Typical Grey’s Anatomy Full of “Risk,” Rivalry & Heartbreak

Calzona’s done, Mer/Der is teetering on the edge, almost done, and we’re not even halfway through this eleventh season of Grey’s Anatomy.

With a title like “Risk,” you knew going into tonight’s episode was going to be risky business.

This one begins with Meredith voiceover saying, “Nobody’s memory is perfect or complete. We jumble things up, lose track of time.” We see flashes of Ellis Grey, Mer/Der fighting about their careers, and that carousel spinning, spinning, just like the lives of our favorite docs on Grey’s Anatomy. Meredith quotes her mom who always said, “The carousel never stops turning.” It sure doesn’t and tonight it spun so out of control crazy, we needed a chart just to keep up.

The Battle Continues

Last week we saw Derek admit to being in a dark place, one where he’s so bitter and depressed that we have to squint our eyes really tight to even remember how much he loved Meredith, or loves Meredith? This week was a Mer/Der fight fest with the Battle Royale launched over the proper care of a patient.

Pierce and Derek are arguing about who gets to attack, I mean fix, a patient first. They both say their surgery is the most important, Maggie with the support of Meredith wants to get to the heart; Derek says, slow down, the brain needs to get fixed first. The poor patient got an infection from a tooth and it’s spread to the heart and brain.

They fight it out, with Shepherd bringing in Richard to be on his side. Before either can rush the patient to the OR, her airway becomes blocked and Pierce has to do an emergency trach. Meredith and Maggie take her in right after and clear up much of the heart infection. She wakes up with no brain damage. Yes! Score one for team girl!

Not the Baby!

Awkward Grey’s moment of the night, Stephanie does April’s ultrasound and accidentally reveals the sex of the baby even though the couple doesn’t want to know it’s a “he.” The funny of the scene where Jackson’s ex treats Jackson’s wife is short lived with the worried look on Stephanie’s face. Edwards studies the pics of the baby and looks really concerned. So concerned in fact that she gets a second opinion from Arizona who thinks there’s something wrong with the baby too. They get a third opinion from Dr. Herman who tragically confirms that it seems to be a rare disorder which often leads to death within a couple of days after being delivered. Who didn’t want to see April and her neurosis unleash on a gaggle of children? We don’t see April and Jackson finding out; that will come after the new year. I can definitely wait on that one.

(ABC/Danny Feld)
KEVIN MCKIDD, MICHAEL ROARK

Dr. Herman Says to Heck with It

Dr. Herman is eating ice cream for breakfast, now. “Life is short,” she explains. She’s peppy and is trying not to let Arizona drag her down with all those pesky brain tumor questions. Just drop it she tells Robbins adamantly.

Arizona is a scheming little doctor tonight, having Herman’s neuro records secretly sent to her without the mean doc’s knowledge. Amelia intercepts the records and gets a little excited at the humongous tumor growing in Herman’s brain. To add one more complication, Arizona catches Herman having sexy time with fellow fellowship doctor, Graham. Wait, I thought Graham was… never mind.

All the drama does lead to a Calzona bittersweet moment with Arizona asking if they can pretend like they’re still together. They need each other for a few minutes. Arizona asks, “Do you even miss me?” Callie says yes, and we all say yes! Not so quick. Robbins adds, “Just not enough.” Yep, Calzona’s still done.

The gross-out scene of the night doesn’t involve blood or a surgery gone wrong. It comes when Herman confronts Arizona about her confronting Graham about the sexy time. She tells the blonde to stay out of her sex life and orgasms. “I can’t spare any. Stop stealing my orgasms,” she commands Arizona. Did we really need to hear about old meany docs sexual escapades?

Turns out the orgasms may have a chance of continuing. Amelia thinks she’s come up with a way to save Herman.

Job Offer Times Two

Meanwhile, a special assistant to the president comes to the hospital to talk to Derek. The Pres does not like hearing the word no. She admits she can’t go back to DC without a yes. Derek says turning down this post was the hardest decision, but “I did it for my family.” He shakes her hand and leaves. Don’t tell me this will make his bitterness level double; he’s had to turn the job down twice. Maybe third time’s a charm? More on that in a bit.

Two Soldiers, a Bionic Leg, and Some Competition

Arizona and Owen are treating two vet amputees testing out a bionic leg. One of the soldiers has the leg on, being pushed by Callie and the fellow soldier. He falls, cracking his head on the floor, and ending up in a coma. Hunt blames Dr. Torres at first, saying she pushed him too much. Callie wants out of the project when the other soldier begs out of the program because he can’t “steal” his buddy’s leg.

Owen and Callie make up later with Hunt pushing her to get back on board with the project and to try to get the healthy soldier back as well.

Interesting new romance alert! Hunt and Amelia, perhaps. Amelia finally tells Hunt about her druggie past with Owen saying they all have issues. No kidding. Later, they have a cute little conversation and now they’re all flirty and asking each other if they “have people” to talk to. Girl Shepherd even volunteers to be there if he needs “people.” Owen’s getting over the exit of Cristina (we never will), and we may be seeing the birth of Humelia? Ew, that sounds like a disease. Maybe, Showen? Okay, let’s stick to Amelia and Owen.

Still Sticking with that Happily Ever After for Alex

The episode shows Jo feeling a little insecure with Alex’s group of needy women constantly hovering around. Jo is freaking out because she doesn’t even eat with her boyfriend in the cafeteria anymore. He’s eating with “his person,” Meredith.

By the end of “Risk” Jo confronts Alex about Meredith always being in their bed and now Arizona’s showing up in the shower. Alex machos it up, saying too bad, that house will always be open for his friends. Jo kinda likes it, telling him it’s okay. They share a sweet, flirty Jolex moment that gives us hope Alex may just get a happily ever after. Fingers crossed. We’re talkin’ to you, Ms. Shonda Rhimes.

(ABC/Danny Feld)
JERRIKA HINTON, SARAH DREW

The Final Act?

Meredith and Derek continue to argue as if they’re both in an arguing marathon. Derek is sticking to his “I gave up everything for you.” While Meredith is hanging onto the “You’re making me pay for the decision you made.”

Derek tells her he could take the job right now; there’s a presidential assistant in town begging for him to accept. Meredith says, “You should take it.”

He smugly grabs his phone, calls the president’s assistant and accepts. Mer says, “Just go now.”

“Oh, I’m going,” he replies. What? First, Calzona, now Mer/Der? Forget what I said about that Alex/Jo happy ending. Not happening on Grey’s, right?

So this may be the end of our favorite Grey’s couple of all time. Or not; I’m really not sure. One thing I am sure of is that it’s the end of TGIT until Grey’s return on January 29. What did you think of all the tragedy tonight? Which couple would you like to see make it to the end of Grey’s Anatomy, maybe season 19 or 20? Let’s enjoy the holidays and block out the Mer/Der fighting, the sick Japril baby, the Calzona break up, and the orgasms of Herman. Instead, let’s give thanks that this long running show remains so strong, giving us the drama filled stories that always seem fresh in spite of old girl’s age.

Grey’s Anatomy returns to ABC on January 29.