TV REVIEW: Dad & Daughter Ninja it Up in Revenge’s “Contact”

Revenge has been teasing us relentlessly for the past couple of weeks. David Clarke is back, crazy, and clueless that his daughter is alive. It’s been enough to make us go dark hoodie on anyone who dares to talk to us while we watch our guilty Sunday night pleasure.

Last episode left us with Emily confronting David out of frustration, finally telling him that yes, I am your daughter! “You could have come for me, but you didn’t.” She wants answers, but before he can give any, Victoria rushes out into a storm and straight into a fallen powerline. So the reunion we’ve all been waiting for is cut short because of Victoria. (I’m thinking she may have done it on purpose.)

Revenge’s latest offering shows the aftermath of the daughter confrontation and after weeks of teasing us with the whole “when will Emily tell dad” we get Emily making “Contact” with said dad.

Queen V is down, shocked by that crazy powerline with David administering CPR and yelling at Emily to call 911. Emily doesn’t lift a finger … no service, perhaps? David says don’t feel bad about not helping, you were scared. Uh, yeah, that must’ve been it. She asks why did you do nothing when I needed you. Dad doesn’t answer, hopping in that ambulance instead.

A Straightjacket with Louise’s Name on It

Our favorite, gorgeous redhead shows her crazy again tonight and it’s padded room, electroshock treatment crazy.

She is the reason that Margaux and Daniel are on the outs. Last week Margaux found out about the Louise/Danny sexy time and threw a drink in Daniel’s face. That’s the French equivalent to we are never getting back together. Ever.

Margaux lets Daniel have it. “I’ve been the target of a mental patient because you couldn’t keep it in your pants. I can’t believe I let myself fall in love with you.” Margaux rushes off leaving Daniel dumbfounded with the love confession.

Who does Margaux run into … Louise, of course. She unloads on the redhead, revved up from the Daniel dressing down, but it’s a little hard to argue with crazy.

Later, Louise shows up at the hospital to visit Victoria with hallucination mama at her side giving her some sage Southern advice “get yourself pregnant by a Grayson.” Perfect! That always works out, right?

Meanwhile, Daniel’s looking all hot, sleeveless sexy at the hotel, running laps around the bar? He gets an equally hot note saying “meet me in the bath. We’ll wash away our worries.” Danny rushes off, jumping in the shower, but it’s Louise he finds there. Daniel’s shocked, as the note was on Margaux’s stationery.

He confronts Louise about her crazy. The redhead counters with, “You’re a stubborn, self-absorbed bastard who won’t visit his sick mother in the hospital.” Oooh, she did not pull the sick mother card?

“Get out!” Daniel kicks her to the curb.

Your plan is not coming together, Louise. I think you’re going to need a little more “Contact” than that to get the whole pregnancy plan to come together.

(ABC/Gilles Mingasson)
KARINE VANASSE, GABRIEL MANN

Nolan is in Demand (of course)

Nolan is in perfect Nolan form tonight (outfits included) with everyone wanting a little piece of him. First up, Jack tracks him down asking, “Where the hell have you been?” Super cop tells blondie about the theory that David possibly killed Conrad but now the cops found the knife on the druggie bad guy who tried to kill Charlotte. I’m so confused. Nolan explains the Emily involvement and says don’t worry. Oh, I’d worry if I were you, Jack.

Next up, Ems seeks Nolan’s counsel, of course, saying she’s done with dad. Nolan advises, “Victoria’s dance with the downed powerline is your opening to reconnect with dad.” He also tells her that she better act fast before that black heart starts ticking on its own.

Later, Nolan’s behind the bar at his new country club. You know, the one he bought when he was feelin’ blue because happiness through retail therapy is a thing.

Margaux is next in line to see Nolan. She says Louise has a sealed criminal record “that only you can hack.” Nolan won’t do it. We all know how he’s attracted to crazy. He likes Red, refusing to help Margaux, saying, “Any enemy of yours is a friend of mine.”

Back at his bar, Nolan sees Louise crying and drowning her sorrows. He asks how he can help adding “I’m in the service industry now, so your happiness is my business. Let’s see how many drinks it takes to make me good at my job.”

Nolan glances at Louise’s iPad and some bizarre photoshopped pics of Louise and Victoria flash onscreen, including one where they’re on a hot air balloon.

“Can’t I just have a normal friend?” Nolan hilariously asks himself. Let us know if you find any normal people, Nolan.

Creeped out by the Louise and Victoria couples slideshow, he skedaddles on over to Margaux, ready to begin that crazy redhead investigation now.

Emily Does Not Get Picked for Team David

David’s at Victoria’s bedside, so glad she’s going to recover. Emily is appalled that dad’s been sucked into the vortex of Vicky evil so quickly. Dad tries to talk to daughter about all the Victoria hate, saying “I suspect that the life that you’ve lived has hardened you too.”

“You have no idea what she’s done to me,” says Emily in the understatement of the season.

David asks, “Why are you lying? Pretending to be someone you’re not?”

Victoria watches this little daddy/daughter reunion and does what any scheming, self respecting Grayson would do … she unplugs herself and flatlines with doctors and David rushing in. Dang, she is good, so good. Or bad. Reunion over, at least temporarily.

Later, dad and daughter continue their talk. “These photos, how did you get them,” David and Emily ask each other at the same time. Jinx. Double jinx.

David’s mad that Emily went on a Revengenda, saying “I never asked for your help!” Ungrateful, dad. I feel that red Sharpie coming out. Cross him out, Ems. C’mon.

So the reunion we’ve all been waiting for is turning into a huge argument every time these two get together. ABC did promo tonight’s episode as “Reunited and it feels so bad.”

(ABC/Gilles Mingasson)
GABRIEL MANN, ELENA SATINE

Daniel Gets a Brain from the Wizard

We wished and wished that Danny boy would get a new brain, or maybe grow a few more brain cells. Our wish is granted in “Contact” with Daniel giving out wise advice and making comments about life that actually ring true.

Daniel shows up to talk to Emily, seeing her crying. He realizes that ex-wife finally told her dad that she’s his daughter. Unbelievably, he sees the despair, the real tears, and instead of burying her, he gives her a pep talk, saying, “don’t give up.”

Daniel also says she can’t give up on dad because, “The hell you put me through was for nothing!”

The last one to visit Victoria, Daniel finally takes a few minutes out of his schedule to check on dear old mom.

He confronts her about being selfish and gloats a little about the turmoil she’s created by not telling David everything. Victoria counters with her canned response,”I did it all for you.” He calls her on the BS saying, you did everything just so you wouldn’t have to be alone.

This new, smarter, advice giving Daniel is almost as adorable as the poor little rich boy who fell for Emily the minute she swept into the Hamptons. These two are going to hook-up, right? The elevator scene last week, the porch scene this week… can a bedroom scene be far off?

(ABC/Gilles Mingasson)
GABRIEL MANN

Dad and Daughter Ninja It Up

Victoria finally has to admit to David that she knew Emily was Amanda. In typical Victoria form, she says she had no choice in keeping the secret. She’s terrified of the evil Emily/Amanda. David seems pretty gullible and forgiving of her.

That night some bad or maybe good men posing as doctors come to kidnap David, but ole Clarke fights them off with Jason Bourne moves and Emily is suddenly there, popping out from under the hospital bed. They ninja it up kicking some bad guy ass. But what was she doing under the bed?

Once alone, David admits to Emily that Conrad didn’t sneak him out of prison. It was another man, one worse than Conrad. What? This man threatened his daughter and showed him pics of Amanda. The minute he heard about his daughter’s death he escaped. “I’m so proud of you Amanda, but I can’t be your father. It’s too dangerous.”

Emily says, “You have no idea what I’m capable of.”

“It’s my turn to protect you. I love you, Amanda. Infinity times infinity.” Aw, this is the reunion we’ve been hoping for.

Nolan can’t believe that David won’t tell daughter who the big, bad Conrad wannabe is. Emily says she’s not pushing him because she wants a relationship with her dad. Nolan has a new plan, but Emily says “Let’s talk about that in the morning. It’s been a long day.” Wait, she’s delaying her revengenda for a night?

Oh no she’s not. Emily’s taking a page from The Blacklist and has her own secret room complete with prisoner inside. No, it’s not Tom. She’s holding one of the fake doctors who must have intel on the bad kidnapper of daddy’s past. Emily goes to work with a hot poker making us more ready than ever for next week’s episode. You know she’s going to have answers by then, probably in about three seconds.

So, what did you think of “Contact?” Did the daddy/daughter heart to heart melt your heart? What do you think Louise’s end game is? And most importantly, is Demily far off? Next week promises more of what Revenge always promises… twisty turns, Emily in full Revenge mode, and Victoria proving once again that there is no limit to her evil plans.

Revenge airs Sundays on ABC at 10 pm.