Our Favorite Chicago Fire & PD Regulars Reimagined as Star Wars Characters

Where were you the moment you found out that a new Star Wars movie is coming out?

Just like some remember where they were when Neil Armstrong set foot on the moon, or when an unspeakable tragedy occurred in our country, this nerd day will burn into the memories of those of us who love the original three (we’re pretending the prequels didn’t happen).  I was watching Chicago Fire, writing a summary along the way, and trying to keep up with Twitter. That’s when I saw it … a tweet mentioning JJ Abrams and Star Wars Episode 7.  Breathless, and a shirt had not even come off on that Fire show.

My exterior may say soccer mom, but my interior is all Comic-Con.  I quickly Googled the details (yes, I did research) and discovered that JJ Abrams signed on to helm the Millennium Falcon.  My excitement went to ecstatic.  JJ (I like to think we’re on a first initial basis) is a genius.  Watch Lost on Netflix if you doubt me.

Oh, oh, wait. Rewind Chicago Fire.  I’ve got to write that review.  Han was jumping off some ledge on screen, I mean Severide.  Call it cognitive dissonance, whatever.  I couldn’t stop thinking about the Force … no, not CPD, although Erin Lindsay is kind of like a modern day Princess Leia.  And then Kelly Severide could be … To hell with the review.  I decided to write this mashup of who our favorite Chicago Fire and Chicago PD characters would be if they got the Star Wars call.

Luke Skywalker – Matt Casey (Jesse Spencer), of course.  He is the main hero of the show, the one who is all good in his fight against all things evil and coming straight for his head. Luke lost his hand, Casey lost his head, sort of. Remember when Luke is nearly killed by Wampa, that Yetti/Big Foot thing on the ice planet?  Casey’s almost killed by a wampa on the heada.  Perfect casting, I say.

Han Solo – Kelly Severide (Taylor Kinney). They’re both brash, arrogant, lady-killin’ hunks who’d do anything for those they love. They share a smart assedness that’s shown with some hilarious one-liners.  Severide’s, “That girl is in serious heat, and I’m not Gandhi” translates to Han’s, “You like me because I’m a scoundrel. There aren’t enough scoundrels in your life” in Star Wars speak.  I think Han Solo’s “Never tell me the odds!” is tattooed on Kelly’s back or wrist or something. Han = Kelly.

Princess Leia – Erin Lindsay (Sophia Bush).  Bad ass to the core these ladies can handle a man or a weapon with equal ease. One weapon they both possess is their words. Erin is the only one  who can tell Voight to quit being an ass and make fun of her partner’s muscle T, while the Princess tells Han, “You have your moments. Not many of them, but you do have them.”  Most importantly, who doesn’t want to see Sophia Bush in a gold bikini chained to anything at all. And do I have to even bring up the hair? Lindsay’s locks were made to become cinnamon buns affixed to each ear.  I rest my case.

Obi Wan Kenobi – Chief Boden (Eamonn Walker). Father figure to all, but especially Casey Skywalker. Boden imparts his wisdom to his men and trains them in the ways of a Jedi firefighter. Tough but caring, strong yet gentle…these two are cut from the same cloth.

Yoda – Dick Wolf.  Enough said.

Darth Vader – Hank Voight (Jason Beghe). Stay with me on this one …Vader was evil and Voight is not (at least not much).  But with that being said, they are the the most kick ass characters ever.  Vader had his throat choke move while Voight has his face slap. Both can kill with a look and if you cross either, your days are numbered.  Do I even need to mention the distinctive voices? Vader has his breathy echo and Voight has a raspy gravel that can shred small animals with a single word.

C-3PO – Mouchmann (Christian Stolte and David Eigenberg).  Mouch and Hermann provide much of the comic relief on Fire while the golden droid gave us so many laughs. They are awkward and we often feel things will never work out for these lovable three.

R2D2 – Tony (Tony). R2 had his beeps; Tony has his one line.

Random Others –

Lando Calrissian – Benny Severide (Treat Williams). They are shmarmy, shady, and selfish, but in the end they’ll come through.

Boba Fett – Gail McLeod (Michelle Forbes). Both are motivated by money, ruthless bounty hunters who will stop at nothing to get their prey.  Boba was after Han Solo while McLeod went after Firehouse 51.

C-3PO and R2D2 TOGETHER – CROTIS (Joe Minoso and Yuri Sardarov). Both pairs argue like an old married couple. Get a room!

Okay, did I get it right?  Where would our favorite paramedics fit in?  Mills?  Who in the heck would be Chewbacca?  While we wait for Star Wars to be reimagined by JJ, let’s meet back here to talk about the last two episodes of ChiFi and the last three of CPD.  I can just see Han, I mean Severide, and Erin floating off into a galaxy far, far away with Dick Wolf orchestrating the entire thing in syndication heaven. Be still my heart.